Chingy’s Page

Perfect 10

Working out is overrated.  

Scratch that.  It’s just not for me.  I leave that kind of thing to the professionals.  Ditto dieting.  I do get curious, though.  Like when Oprah lost all that weight (most recently - before she discovered her thyroid problem) I thought, “now how in the hell did she do that?”, but after listening to ten minutes of Bob Greene, I figured I look good enough.  

My fitness philosophy (slash conspiracy theory) - the gym is filled to the gills with sado-masochists.

FEARS

• the gym
• hot fifty year olds, ie: Madonna
• sweat
• fitness gurus, ie: Richard Simmons, Bob Greene the AntiChrist 
• magazines with workout advice
• Kelly Ripa (not fitness related)

THOUGHTS

• have a coke and a smile (but only if it has sugar in it)
• walk, don’t run
• wearing your athletic gear in public isn’t fooling anyone
• random mandatory dance parties are fun for the whole family 
• buying bigger pants isn’t as bad as a muffin top
• “i wish i had a pot” 
• denying yourself cake can only lead to binge-eating later
• if junk in the trunk made J. Lo famous, think of what it could do for you
• a lot of things taste better than skinny feels
• wear your confidence on your sleeve